I Come to the Garden Alone

I.
I am a gangling girl
Poised on the cusp of womanhood
I run along a shaded path
Beneath the giant Norway pines
Long legs flash, my cotton dress flies behind me like a flag
Bare feet beat a rythmn
Long, dark braids slap against my back
I run for the shear joy of feeling the wind on my face

Suddenly, I burst out of the dark canopy
My heart is thundering in my chest
I have come to the secret place
Below me, the water kisses the giant, blue bowl of the sky
And there he is...waiting for me
Sitting among the sand dunes and sea-grass

He sees me, smiles and lifts his hand
And I run to him
He is the best big brother, so strong and kind
I drop beside him, he ruffles my hair
Quietly, I sit beside him, hand tucked into the crook of his arm
Warm sun on my face, toes tucked into the cool sand
Perfectly content
The only sounds, the low roar of the waves and the wind in the pines

All that lovely afternoon we sit together
Watching clouds scuttle across the sky
Listening to the sea gull's sharp cries
Until at last the heavens turn crimson
And I must go
See you soon, I say
And he smiles into my eyes

II.
I'm weary from wee ones
Tugging on my clothes, tugging at my breast
Sweet, dear babies sucking all my strength
Until all I long for is sleep
My mother understands
Go run, she says
So I run
Away from the house, away from the road
Until I am all alone

I hear the sound of footsteps beside me
I sense that he is there
Will you run with me, Jesus?
Matching me footstep for footstep
He goes with me all the way

III.
I'm so crazy in love with him
I can't get enough of his face, his words, his love
I would die for you! I cry
You will, he replies
He shows me a man grinding wheat
Over and over the grain is ground
Some is coarse and dark, some is fine and light
What is it to you
I f I decide to make a fine powder of you? He asks

I am shattered
The pieces of my life lie like shards of glass around my feet
Reflecting only brokenness
In the darkness, I try to find him
Knowing him only by his fragrance
For I cannot see him or hear his voice

All that terrible long night
I cling to his garment
When ever I can find it
And when I can't
I lie down on the floor
And whisper his name

IV.
He has made a secret garden for me
It has a little iron gate
He puts in my hand the only key
No one can come here but you and me
Within the walls are pure delight
A fountain sprays and flowers bloom
Color and fragrance everywhere

Dance for me, I hear his request
Only for him, I lose my shyness
Awkwardly, my feet stumble
Wonderful, he says
Suddenly, I feel as if I am dancing before armies
Twirling, stomping, I leap and hang suspended in the air
Like a ribbon in a dancer's hand
Time stands still and I gracefully land
I want so much to please him

I sing a song of love and longing
And he delights in me
I feel cherished and loved again
I am beautiful in his eyes
Come as often as you want, he says
I will meet you here

V.
I lean over the garden gate
Looking down the road, longing for him
I wait
Then, I see him coming
My darling, I cry, my love, my fair one
I shower him with kisses
Taking his hand, I lead him into our garden

We sit beside the fountain
He always loves and comforts me
Today I feel his burdens
Let me share your sorrows, I beg
And he opens his heart to me for a dying world
And we weep together